Yesterday marked the two year anniversary of my mother’s death and I’m feeling sad and a little guilty. I loved my parents dearly and was well aware that the clock was ticking most of my adult life. I wanted to always be there for them, to share my life and my children with them, to make the time and the effort to call and to visit regularly.
Truthfully, there was an element of selfishness involved. I was determined to not be like so many who live with regrets after losing the opportunity to say and to celebrate all that their parents mean to them.
I told them incessantly that I loved them. I planned family vacations to see them. I called every week. I even made a quilt to honor both that hang on the walls of my home today. But I still have regrets. I still feel guilt because toward the end I know I could have done more. A few more calls, a few more visits, a few more hugs, a few more ‘I love you’s.’
You’ve heard it before and you’ll hear it again. Once they’re gone, they’re gone. Loving and honoring and spending time with your parents while you still can is as much for you as it is for them. It’s the selfless selfish act that you’ll never regret.